Understanding self-regulation: starting points

Educators have increasingly taken an interest in the topic of self-regulation over recent years. Not only does self-regulation offer us a new way to think about young people's behaviour, but there is plenty of research linking executive function skills to positive educational and wider outcomes. Anecdotally, since the start of the pandemic, more and more schools and settings are reporting increased levels of needs in learners. There is a desire to find solutions which support young people to develop self-control, regulate their emotions and manage their own behaviours. Rather than only focusing on external systems to do the work of managing behaviour in our settings, educators are increasingly looking to find ways to help learners internalise the skills involved in maintaining appropriate behaviours for learning in class.

In England, the EYFS Statutory Framework includes reference to some key self-regulation skills, grouping them under the heading of "Personal, Social and Emotional Development" (PSED). PSED is one of the 'prime' (or key) areas of early learning. It underpins healthy development and educational progress alongside the two other prime areas of "Communication and Language" and "Physical Development". It is interesting to note the level of expectations in the way that this part of the latest Statutory Framework is phrased. Not only are children expected to develop a positive sense of self, but they must also have confidence in their abilities, persist and wait for what they want, direct their attention "as necessary" and "resolve conflicts peaceably". Observers might note that even adults often struggle with these skills. While they are a key part of development for the 0-5 age range, the idea that they might be fully developed by the end of the early years seems wildly optimistic, particularly at present.​

​A good way to understand self-regulation skills is to think of them as being like an "air traffic control system" for the brain. This metaphor is explained further in this excellent working paper from Harvard's Center for the Developing Child. Essentially, this is a set of skills which help us to manage ourselves within the range of different environments we might find ourselves in - that metaphorically stop us from 'bumping into' each other in social, educational and other contexts. They allow us to guide our own 'flight paths' through our lives, managing our responses, staying on an even emotional keel and coping with the challenges that we face.

There are three key areas of executive (or brain) function involved in our ability to regulate ourselves: these are working memory, impulse control and mental flexibility. Working memory is important because it can help us think things through in our minds - thinking about our actions is a key facet of self-regulation. It also helps us remember a series of things we might need to do, ticking them off mentally one by one, for instance when we need to follow instructions. Impulse control allows us to stop ourselves from responding immediately to external stimuli, particularly where it might not be helpful or appropriate. Finally, mental flexibility allows us to face challenges and come up with alternative solutions to try and solve problems. This helps us to avoid the situation where we come up against an issue but repeatedly take the same linear path to attempt (and fail) to resolve it.

When thinking about the behaviours which fall under the umbrella term of 'self-regulation', this encompasses a wide-ranging set of skills. While there has been a relatively strong focus in schools on supporting the development of emotional regulation, in fact this area forms only part of the picture. Self-regulation is about becoming aware of, understanding and learning to control our behaviours, including the development of impulse control and deferred gratification. It involves the ability to control our attention, concentrating on what we need to, learning how to manage distractions and move our focus around as needed.  It involves becoming aware of our feelings, understanding their source, learning how to handle strong emotions and building the skill of empathy with others.  And it also involves goal-oriented behaviours, such as setting ourselves sensible targets, working to achieve these, and coping with both challenge and failure.

Underpinning the development of self-regulation is the vital need for agency: it is crucial to focus in on the 'self' part of the descriptor term 'self-regulation'. If we are going to learn how to manage ourselves, we cannot rely only on habituated responses to external stimuli. We need to learn to focus in on ourselves and our personal experiences of the world, building a sense of self and gradually developing the ability to manage our reactions to the range of situations we encounter. This, I think, might be one of the reasons why we are seeing young people and also educators pushing back against those school systems which exert ever greater control in order to 'manage behaviour'. If we want young people to build intrinsic motivation and a sense of self, they need to believe that they have the power to choose their own behaviours for themselves and, in so doing, to change and improve their experience of their world.

In the next blog in this series, I will look at the various factors which need to come together to support the development of self-regulation. My latest book, which looks at all these topics in much greater depth, is The Ultimate Guide to Self-Regulation, published in January 2025. You can pre-order a copy here.